A Teacher's Manifesto

   

 "Can't you just man up, or to be a woman, and use your mind to get through things?"- Alex
      This comment on my YouTube video made my day! There were so many answers, so many layers in the question that I couldn't just respond in the comments section.
      It came in when I was working on Finger Tips 2, a questions answered video to respond to emails and comments from my Jin Shin Jyutsu video. The video was a bit boring; question, answer, question, answer. I couldn't make it work, but still felt like it needed to be the next video. Next week's video was infinitely more interesting and fun to make, but I couldn't let go of Finger Tips 2.
       As I played around with his question, my first thought was yes, I can use my mind to get through things. I used it to tell myself to use Jin Shin Jyutsu, right? (Not proud of that response by the way.  Turns out my inner voice is a bit sarcastic.) When I pondered it a bit more I realized that he got right to the heart of why I teach and make these videos.
     Right now, I'm like a baby crawling around on the floor of life. Yes, I get around, but it's not very fast and my knees get really dirty. Using techniques like Jin Shin Jyutsu lets my inner baby pull up on the coffee table and see that there is so much more to be once I learn to walk. One day I will walk around the room freely and only use the coffee table to hold my coffee or teach other babies how to see life's possibilities.
     The question also really helped me to clarify why I do what I do. My desire is to show others how beautiful and powerful they really are. This is where true healing occurs. This is when you become what you truly are.
     As you heal yourself, you change the way you move in the world. Your kindness and gentleness rubs off on those around you. They, in turn, are changed.
      This is our grand opportunity. I make videos and teach classes to help individuals with the sure knowledge that they will pass the relief and happiness on tho those they come in contact with.
      When you control your thoughts and your mind, as Alex suggested, and live your truth, the world becomes a wonderful place to live.

Stand Up! Simple Tips for Improving Confidendce

     I never thought about it much, but at the Naval Academy, if you were being inspected (or possibly, being in trouble) you stood at attention, just like my classmates on the left. If someone was talking or giving you information to remember, you were put at parade rest. To my teenager eyes, parade rest looked a lot like Wonder Woman and felt really silly. Really, stand with your feet spread, elbows wide, hands crossed at the small of your back. How unnatural is that?
     Come to find out, the military knew what it was doing.  Amy Cuddy and her fellow researchers discovered that standing in a powerful position, like Wonder Woman, actually changes your brain chemistry to make you more confident (original publication here). As little as two minutes can boost your testosterone, making you feel more confident and in charge. It also reduces your cortisol. This improves your ability to deal with stressors and decreases anxiety.
     When I went through my photos to create the video, it was actually hard to discard some. I had so many images of both high and low power poses. It is amazing what you can see once someone opens your eyes.
     Her video changed my life in other profound ways. I am so aware of how I sit and stand now. Sometimes it is in that scolding way, you know, the inner voice that nags "stand up straight, shoulders back." More often, it is "look at how you are standing or sitting. That must mean you are uncomfortable here. Need to change that."
      I'll give you an example. I have been taking voice lessons for about three years. I was so incredibly shy about singing in public that joining the choir had ruined my appreciation of the liturgy. Something needed to be done. About six months ago I was having a lesson in the practice spaces of a local music academy.  This meant that everyone could overhear all my mistakes on this difficult peice. I felt wildly out of place. After singing the song for the final time, my teacher said "That is the best I have ever heard you sing." I immediately crossed my legs, crossed my arms and tucked my head down. Basically I got into the lowest power pose I could do without quivering in the corner. It made me realize how far I still have to go.
     Think of body language as a great diagnostic and power posing as the miracle cure. Those admirals knew what they were doing. Who knew?

The World's Most Dangerous Word

"I'll try."

I couldn't believe my ears. The young man standing before me was a tutoring student. He is Japanese and about to go back to Japan to take the college entrance test. The family is spending lots of money and he was taking the test that would determine his future for the next six years and he was going to try.

Normally, I'd let it pass. I'm not his parent only his tutor. But his mother was standing in the room with us and was clearly worried about sending him out to do this important task. His posture did not inspire confidence. You could hear the implied "...and fail" in his statement.

So I treated him like one of my sons and called him on his language. Both he and his mother were bewildered. She even said "Maybe we don't understand what the English word try really means." Rather than explain with words, I pulled out a dining room chair and said "I'm trying to sit down." My behind slowly descended, but never reached the chair. Her face changed in an instant to glowing comprehension, then she began to scold her son. Moments of deep understanding are a precious thing. I felt privileged to witness.

Language is vital.

What we hear becomes what we believe becomes our actions in the world.

The brain hears what we say and makes it real. Does a batter approach the plate and try to hit the ball? Only if he wants to miss. He has a responsibility to the team and will follow through. I was made aware of the weakness of 'try' by Carolyn Nyland of Kaleidoscope Learning Center during a Brain Gym class.

As we learned how movement helps the brain work better, she caught us over and over using the word 'try.' By the end of the three day class, I was hyper aware of how weak our language use was. I resolved to make my life a 'try'-free zone.

The word try is short and sweet. It gets people off our backs. "I'll try to make it." Meaning you won't be there, and please stop asking me. "I'll try this math problem." Yeah, right. It reminds me of running the Turkey Trot about ten years ago. I ran for the last two miles about 20 feet behind a guy dressed in an enormous turkey costume. There were feathers that went from his low back to over his head.

The first thing I did when I went home was find someone to make me a vinyl wall art with Yoda's famous quote "Do or Do not there is no try." It is a great reminder to both myself and my clients that we believe what we say about ourselves.

When the word 'try' walks into your brain and attempts to rent a space, throw him out on his ear.

Acupressure for Depression, or the video that almost cost a life

   

     We had a beautiful sunset this Wednesday.  I acutally followed it around town, trying to find the perfect spot. It started with a beautiful rosy glow over the library, then progress to the flame texture you see at left, then ended with beautiful streaks filling half the sky. It was so amazing, even the pictures I took facing east, just showing the reflected glory, were beautiful. This picture is my favorite. Check out the pink dove in the left corner made by cloud that dipped down and reflected the beauty.
     January and February are usually the darkest months of the year here in Northern Kentucky.  These are the months that I tend to teach classes like 'Taking the Sting out of Stress.' It's the time where everyone who can heads to the tropics for the sun or huddles indoors.
     Inspired by the sunset, I decided to write a post about hope. The last two years have been quite a challenge. When my youngest went to school, it was full time, year round. The three weeks he spent at home this Christmas was the longest he'd been at home for two and a half years. My oldest son graduated from UK and went on (gasp!) to have a life of his own. And my husband started doing international traveling. How dare they have lives of their own! And all at the same time.
     As my carefully constructed and nurtured family moved on, I found myself with a bit of time on my hand. Let's just say all the coping strategies I taught and used sporadically for the last ten years really came in handy.  In some ways I became my own student and in others I just fell on Divine Providence. Sure enough with techniques that I knew and friends that I love, it all worked out.
     So, inspired by the beautiful sunset and an uptake in viewership, I set out to make another YouTube video.  Little did I know what I was in for.  In the past few days, I received over a quarter of a million views on one of my videos. It is great, but also makes for an inbox I'd love to learn to keep up with (problem of sucess- one I've always prayed for). It was to be about acupressure for depression. Little did I know how much I'd need it in the making of the video.
     It was so easy. I knew what I wanted to say. I made simple drawings in 53Paper to illustrate. What could go wrong, right?
 Pinnacle Pro app on this device and 20+ on my old iPad 2. What could go wrong?

   I started the video three days ago. It took a few hours to work out the story line and pictures. Par for the course. I decided to use my new iPad Pro because, it's new, right? I had already made several videos with my
     Yes, I know its a leading question, but way too much fun to say to just omit. The answer was, everything.  I made the video. Twice. Then three times. Then four. But it just would not export to YouTube. After a day and a half more of working on (and failing at) Mr. Mohawk and his acupressure recommendations, I needed the treatment, not my viewing audience. I was ready to stab a knife right through Mr. Mohawk's third eye. I had to recreate the whole thing using a different app. I needed to find my peace in order to give up two days of work. So, I decided that each time I worked on a section of the video, as I listened to the voiceover or worked on a slide or went back, again, to the failed video to scavenge the body for bits I could use, I would use the acupressure points for a few minutes.
       I couldn't believe how calm I was. I just remade the video. Now, in the interests of full disclosure, I was only calm when no one added any extra input. My husband is thanking his lucky stars that he still has his head, but I didn't break the iPad, my computer, or anyone I hold dear. This is their lucky day. Just think if I was working on a post about karate...
    Here's the video. It saved my husband's life. I hope it helps yours.