A Love Story

      What is love?  On Valentine's Day, it seems like an excellent question.  I have had a life surrounded by love (many thanks to all).  I have had the love of my family and friends and, of course, the wonderful love of my husband and children.  I have so many love stories.
       Last weekend's yoga class with Sianna Sherman is also a love story, though perhaps not it the way you would imagine.  For almost all of these classes with traveling teachers, I come alone.  It feels like everyone else is there with friends, except me.
       Now, I know this is not true, but our perception (not our intellect) is our reality.  So here I was, in this full weekend of classes that were going to be so hard, all alone.  As the class began to fill, a woman and her friend put down mats beside mine.  Sianna's classes are popular, so the room is very full.  There was about six inches between my mat and her's.
         So I introduced myself, she said "Hi, I'm....." and turned back to her friend.  Putting myself in her shoes, totally appropriate, but from my perspective I was now not one of the 'cool kids.'  I knew I was wrong, but there it was.  I spent some time feeling a bit hurt as they chatted their way through the opening moves.
         Then it was time to become childlike without being childish.  Children are open to all of the options, always letting life develop rather than freezing into one sad moment.  I decided that I would love her.  Just spend my practice time in love rather than in loneliness.  Through two and a half hours of serious sweat and heart-opening poses, I stayed in the feeling of love.  Nothing specific, but just the idea that we are all one and everyone is lovable.  It was a bit selfish.  If I am feeling love, I definitely am not feeling lonely.
         We broke for lunch and then it was back to two and a half hours of hip openers.  This means moving into one another's physical space, not more six inches separation and still no small talk.  I just kept loving her.  By the end of the class the barriers had slowly fallen, I had become a person. Now, when we fell it was funny and being so close was comfortable. When we laid down for savasana, as she relaxed her hand gently rolled out to brush mine and she did not move it away.
        I had this unbelievable experience of we are all one.   Everyone in the room was lifting me up and I was in turn lifting them.  Love didn't need to change everyone, all it needed to do was change me.  Happy Valentine's Day.

Life in Your Years

      Last night I had the most amazing realization.  This December 7th, Pearl Harbor Day, my father in law turns 93.  I never really thought about it much, it was just a number, right?
      I am 47, this means that my father in law is almost twice as old as I... So everything that I have done, being born, going to school, serving in the Navy, marriage for 24 years, raising two children who are now off to college, that's only half of his life!  Seriously, who knew?

From National Geographic, May 2013

       I have been doing lots of research into longevity and happiness this past year.  It's not so much that I want to live forever, but I do want to be vigorous and happy.  What I'm looking for is captured in the picture at left.  It is of Rae Kline at age 83.  The caption in the magazine says "'A perpetual motion machine' is how Kline, of Solana Beach, California, describes herself.  An early advocate of yoga in the U.S., she demonstrates knees-to-ears pose.  Her daily exercise includes a mile swim, and hour of biking, and a four mile beach walk."
      That's what we are talking about.
       Okay, so far I still can't do this pose, but I am ready keep trying and embrace the exuberance that I see in her life.  Want to join me?

Don't Carry the World in Your Shoulder

     I had the most interesting experience attending yoga class Friday.  It was a great class, but as is usually the case, the student (yes, me) didn't just learn the lesson that the teacher taught, but rather what she was ready to hear (finally).
     Today was a rainy foggy day.  It took a full hour to drive the 22 miles to class.  On the way there I kept thinking how nice it would be to do a class full of heart opening poses and meditations.  November has been a full month with both highs and lows, and my heart could use some help.
     I was late, so had to wait outside until the chanting and meditation were over.  Fortunately, I go to class with my Mom, so she had saved a space for me.  I unrolled my mat and began class.  One of the students who had been on time must have asked for heart openers, because she began the class I desired.
     Our instructor, Wendy, is a great teacher.  She carefully sequences classes and adds thoughtful observations.  I began to notice that as my heart grew more open, my chest and shoulders expanded and my neck began to complain.  Not only did it hurt, but it said 'if you don't stop now I am going to have my revenge soon.'  Let's just say my neck has quite a personality.

    Fallen caryatid carrying an urn

             Auguste Rodin

     I felt like Rodin's Caryatid, crushed under the weight of the building she was trying to hold up. I finally gave up on class and laid down on the floor for seriously early savasana.  Now I always tell my students to stop when they need to, but in my heart I was wishing to finally get to do all things. Here I am, however in the body I have it it just can't, yet.  So everyone else around me continued with the class and I lay down.
     Laying down in savasana, as a teacher, I always talk about how it puts together the class, settles it in the body.  In moving, I had felt this deep resistance inside my shoulder to letting go.  I've done a lot of traveling to and from my in laws and seeing my father in law who has dementia.  I have lots of issues inside that shoulder and it didn't seem to want to let go.
      I just laid down on the floor in a receptive posture.  It took a long time for everything to relax down into the floor.  When it did, I intellectually poked around into this resistance in my shoulder and in my heart.  Usually I feel that resistance because there are things that I haven't really admitted that I am thinking.   As I spent time with it feelings arose.
      Part of it was this deep sorrow for my father in law, who is in no way living the life he wanted for himself, although now he's actually pretty content.  Dementia seems to be a pretty happy place for him because he has let go of his worries.  My inner concern is a bit selfish, but I couldn't help feeling that if he were my age (which he was at one time) this is not where he would want to be.
       When I looked deeper into my heart I realized that I also felt lost, like a child running around a huge department store who cannot find her parents.  This is his path and it is not my job to fix it, though I do so love fixing things.
        In this case the 'a ha!' moment did not lead to resolution, just awareness.  Now, what to do?  I imagined that I was a child and sat on God's lap and leaned my head in and let myself feel sad and lost. When I felt His love come towards me, that good feeling was too big a leap. I wasn't ready to feel good. I thought maybe I'll just rest, rather than receive all that love.  When you are down, the step up to content is leap enough.
      Then I just... rested.

       What's funny is my shoulder hurts more now, because it has more mobility and the muscles have been so tightly clenched they don't want to deal with the freedom.  In the last two days I have spent time meditating and relaxing to solidify the gains.  Nothing makes the situation better, but at least now I am not making it worse.
     It was a very, very interesting savasana.

Fallen caryatid carrying an urn
Auguste Rodin

At 46, I grew an inch! (or yoga theraputics, part 2)

Sianna in nataranjasana

     For this post, the title says it all.  I went to the doctor last week and discovered I am a whole inch taller (can you hear the wild crazy celebration on my end?).  It all began a year and a half ago.  I attended a workshop with Sianna Sherman that started an amazing transformation, and now I'm a whole inch taller (fireworks and great rejoicing!).
    How did I do this, one might ask? It is both easier and harder than you think.  Just put your mind on the base of your spine. Sounds easy, but look at Sianna in nataranjasana (lord of the dance pose) at the left.  If I were to move into that pose without thinking, I'd put one arm up, one back and grab a foot.  That is what it looks like, but not what it is. Nataranjasana is an expression of joy, of hiddenness, of openness that begins deep within the body and ends up looking like the picture.

      We're going to explore the spinal focus in a much easier pose, tadasana (mountain pose), more commonly known as standing.  If you look to the right, you'll see a spinal column with the different sections color coded.  We are interested in the sacrum (yellow) and the coccyx or tailbone (blue).    
      Come into tadasana (mountain pose). Imagine that you can consciously move the energy in your spine.  Notice the base of your spine.  Let all of the energy in your sacrum rise up through the body.  Allow all of the energy in the tailbone sink down through your legs.  That's it.  So simple, yet so profound.
       What I have noticed is that as I rise the sacral energy (energy from the sacrum, not sacred, or holy energy), sometimes it feels like it gets stuck, or moves more slowly.  If this happens for you, just be patient, allow the energy to bloom.  Also, the tailbone energy can move more strongly in one leg or another.  Usually this means I need to lift the heel of the "stuck" leg and move it out slightly to free things up.
       The best thing about this practice is how easy it is to be so thoughtful.  This can be done waiting in the checkout line at the grocery, answering emails, or any time you are standing around, as well as adding to your daily yoga practice.

Sianna Sherman

        In the first month after the class, people began to remark on how good my posture was.  After about seven months I began to notice that I was slumping when I talked to people to try to get my eyes at the level they used to be.  After a year, I noticed I was hunching over the lectern to get my mouth back at the level of the microphone. At one year and 9 months from the class I am an inch taller!
        Added side benefit: as I was writing this post I had the great idea to check my BMI online.  The good news is that adding the inch pushed me from overweight to normal.  Now, we all know this is just in my head. I'm the same person who walked into that doctor's office, but let me tell you she feels much better about herself.
     If you'd like to learn more from this master teacher in the privacy of your own home, you can purchase her DVD,  Pranam (here's my review).  The other big thing I learned in that class is in this post.  Add this to your practice and enjoy growing taller with me!

Love the Body You Have

I had an interesting thought a few days ago sparked by a hole in my photo album.  I’ve been searching for pictures for my website and, though I've been teaching yoga for years, there are only 4 pictures of me doing yoga and none at all of my classes (the photo at left I call downward dog with upward cat).  I realized I had never been satisfied by how my body looked as I did yoga.  Not that I was embarrassed, I have no problems demonstrating anything. I just don't feel photogenic.  Aren't all yogis tall and slender? 

Now, this body has taught yoga class every Tuesday for the last 9 and a half years, how could I be so disrespectful of it?  What if, rather than considering the body mine, I look at it from the outside and think about it as if it were someone else’s.  What if I treated my body like it was loaned to me by a friend?  Think about how careful you are when driving a friend’s car.  It gets returned without a scratch and the tank is full of gas, right?

So, if the body is a loaner, the first thing we need to do is appreciate the gift.  After all, how would my spirit express itself without hands to type or a mouth to laugh?  It puts gratitude in a whole new light.  I can see the strength and endurance of the legs, the cleverness of the hands, the pleasure of curly hair.  Arm balances are so easy in this body, and so is sitting on the floor.  The neck hurts, so I should take better care of it.  It’s tired, I'll

give it a rest.

Isn't this mental shift interesting?  It’s like treating ourselves the way we treat a beloved pet.  Ignore the slobber, appreciate the love.  This week try one yoga practice or one meditation session from this point of view.  It is remarkable.

Let's Go to the Mat

I've been thinking a lot recently on the benefits of yoga and meditation, started a couple of posts that completely fizzled, but yesterday found something perfect. From How God Changes Your Brain: Breakthrough Findings from a Leading Neuroscientist, here is exactly what I've been trying to write. (He approaches the subject from the perspective of meditation because that is what the whole book is about.)

Exercise can even be viewed as a form of meditation because it involves sustained concentration and a deliberate regulation of body movements and breathing.  Studies have even shown that it enhances relaxation and spiritual well-being.

Vigorous stretching, such as yoga, also does wonders for both your body and your brain.  yoga has similar cognitive benefits to other forms of contemplative meditation, and in a recent meta-analysis of 813 meditation studies, the researchers stated that yoga was as beneficial s exercise.  It can lower the risk of cardiovascular disease, help control the symptoms of diabetes, lessen the severity of menopausal symptoms, reduce chronic back pain, and prevent the onslaught of migraine headaches. 

In a study conducted in 2007, researchers at the Boston University School of Medicine found that levels of the neurotransmitter GABA increase after a single sixty-minute yoga session.  Since people who suffer from depression and anxiety disorders have low levels of GABA, yoga exercise is a valid modality for improving psychological mood.  It's even been found to reduce the symptoms of schizophrenia.  Research has also show that a few weeks of yoga training enhances a wide range of cognitive skills in children and adults.

Talk about a million reasons to go to the mat every day.  See you there.

 

 

Open Your Heart

    Yesterday was amazing- both informative and transformative.  It all began in the church basement.  I have taught the yoga class there for over 9 years.  One would think that by now it would be routine.  This Tuesday was anything but routine.
      Upstairs in church there was a 6 year old girl's funeral.  Our church has been praying for her for months.  I gave it a lot of thought; how to reconcile the two, death and healing.  I had thoughts, but no coherent plans.  On the way over I received a call from a student who had arrived very early. Some of the people who were preparing for the reception after the funeral had expressed concern at the lack of respect holding a yoga class would have for the funeral above.  This balance, however, is one of the great skills of living.  How to be present and have life in the middle of awful things.  The world is always with us; how to be of the world, yet not in it.
       Before we began class, we set a few guidelines for the length of class (it would be shorter) and the least conspicuous way to exit the building (so a bunch of ladies in workout clothes carrying yoga mats would not disrupt the reception).  All of these things worked out well. We left the building just as the service was ending, but this was not the important part.  What was amazing was the powerful impact this shortened class had.
        Recently I have been experimenting with using the breath to let me know which aspects of my body are holding tension, where should I target my practice.  Let's begin.  Stand comfortably with your eyes closed.  Take a deep breath.  Without exhaling, breathe in some more and if possible a little more.  Notice where your feel tension in your body, then let all that air out in one long slow exhale. The part of the body where you are holding the most tension feels all jammed up as you try to bring more air into a full body.  This exercise feels different every time it is done.  Watching a class full of people perform it, give the teacher a strong idea of how to structure the upcoming class.
        Tuesday morning the tension was in everyone's upper chest.  Given the stress of the funeral and shorter time span, I put together a very different class.  If you'd like to try it out, here is a link to a 20 minute version.  Let's just say, the class was unique enough  that I wasn't sure how effective it was.  Did the heart openers work, and would they hold over after the students left?
        My question was answered on my way home.  Now, a class is much less physically powerful for the teacher than the student, because the teacher is focused outward on demonstration and her students, but I found a huge change had taken place in myself.  On my way home I had to stop at the grocery store because I was completely out of produce.  As I walked around the store, I noticed something strange. People kept staring at me in the face,  like they knew me and expected me to talk with them.
        Now I'm not talking about the produce manager or all of the people who work the checkout lanes; those are people I know well and we talk all the time.  These were people I had never met before.  a Japanese man, an Indian woman, a mother with small kids, the man picking up salt for his driveway (in anticipation of the "white death").  They all seemed to expect me to address them.  I had never realized how "in my own world" I was when I shopped.  Turns out when my heart is open and I am looking around, everyone I met wanted in on the joy.
       This phenomena was well described in How God Changes Your Brain: Breakthrough Findings from a Leading Neuroscientist.  "As many studies have shown, the more compassionate we become, the more generous those around us become... Thus, when we treat others with kindness and respect (in my case, just noticing that they were there), even those who hold different beliefs will respond in kind.  An upward spiral is created that stimulates the anterior cingulate, a crucial part of the true heart ans soul of the brain."  He calls it "reciprocal altruism."  Noticing my neighbor allowed them to notice me as well.  It was a great shopping trip.

The Power of Rest

        You know how in December I extolled practice in Practice Makes Perfect?  Well, just to prove that I love both sides of any argument, here is the benefit of rest.  In January and most of February I have caught every little thing that is going around.  Let's just say I have experienced enforced rest first hand.
       One thing I have noticed over the years is that if I take a week off the more intense class that I take with my mom each Friday, the next week I come back stronger and more flexible.  A month off does not have the same effect (too bad!). In all my studies, I have never seen or heard anyone mention it.  I was beginning to wonder if it was all in my mind. Finally I have an explanation and a reason to sit around enjoying Christmas (or whatever illness crops up).

     Pavel Tsatsouline has lit my inner darkness with his book,
Relax into Stretch : Instant Flexibility Through Mastering Muscle Tension.  Let's just start off with, this book is hilarious.  He has this "just go for it" attitude and keeps calling the reader comrade.  For a Navy woman from the Cold War, this is just off kilter enough to really please.
     But I digress, we were talking about the power of a few days off.  He says "motor-learning experts know that a skill tends to improve after a layoff, the so-called reminiscence effect.  Multiple repetitions of a drill, a rock climbing technique, a reverse puch, a split, or a deadlift, forms what Russians cal the dynamic stereotype, or a 'how-to manual' of this movement in the athlete's nervous system.  You learn to perform exactly as practiced- the form, the force, the range of motion, etc.... If you lay off stretching, your brain gets a chance to forget your limit.  This is the essence of ther reminiscence effect.  Once your own personal record has been erased, you are ready to train for a new one."
      I was completely surprised last week when I returned to vigourous practice.  Even though I had a hard time breathing, my not only was I stronger, but also each movement was deeper.  It was great.  I'm just wondering how long I have to lay off to forget how tight my hamstrings are... Happy stretching. :)

Namaste, (or how to really open your heart!)

        I have been taking lots of yoga classes recently.  It's an area of my life where I can really see a lot of growth, so I have been watering and fertilizing regularly.  What has been fascinating is that, though the poses grow ever more challenging, the hardest part is the emotional and spiritual growth.  I'll give you an example in the word "Namaste."
      As I explain to each new student, namaste means "the divine in me salutes the divine in you."  In practice, it means as the student learns from the teacher, so the teacher learns from the student.  Over my years of teaching I have found the second half of the statement to be particularly true.  Teacher training is important, but the practical experience is what refines and defines you as a teacher.
     So here I am, going to all these new teachers (with the cold and flu season we've been having, there have been loads of substitutions), and challenging the first half of the statement, the idea that everyone has something to teach me in every situation where we come into contact.  As a rule, I prefer a quiet, challenging class, with a teacher who knows a lot about the functions of the muscles and bones, and avoid a class that is more like a "workout," that leans towards Pilates.
     A few weeks ago I ended up with a teacher who leaned towards the workout end of the spectrum.  When I heard the other classes she taught, my mind and heart slammed shut.  Through the whole class I kept telling myself, 'there is something to learn from everyone' and 'keep a open mind.'  It was an uphill struggle.  I'm getting old enough and gaining enough experience to understand how hard it can be to keep an open mind while we age.  The idea of "been there, done that"  raises it's ugly head ever more frequently.
     After doing sit ups and leg raises (ugh!), we moved on to the prone portion of our class.  Here my struggle was vindicated.  We got into a prone twist in a way I have never seen before in 14 years of practice!  And it fit so perfectly with the direction my teaching and personal practice has been leading.  I was so grateful to be wrong.  The best part was the prone twist (Supta Matsyendrasana) was turned into a heart opener. Truly the divine in my teacher was revealed to me, though it had been there all along.
      Namaste.

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For those of you playing along at home, here's a great addition to your practice.

Begin lying on your side, stacking knees, hips, feet, shoulders, arms, hands.  Arms are straight out in front of you, just below eye level.  Think classic side sleeper's posture with straight arms.

Move your top hand up a little so the fingers touch the floor on the top hand and the back of the hand touches the floor on the bottom hand. 

Keeping the legs stacked, begin to trace a rainbow on the floor over your head, trailing fingertips along or near the floor.  Your hand begins at about shoulder height then moves up and over your head and out to the side. As the arm passes over your head allow the body to begin to twist open.

Finish moving your hand when the arms are stretched open wide.  Enjoy the feeling of an open supta matsyendrasana.

To exit the pose, sweep your hand and arm back over your head.  Roll to the other side, stacking hips, knees, feet, shoulders, arms, hands. Repeat the sweeping opening of the arms. Enjoy.

Nine Years! (and counting...)

    This morning we celebrated 9 years of yoga at Saint Timothy Church!  It has been such a blessing to me.  When I first began, I was brand new to teaching yoga.  I knew I had a lot to offer, but I was way intimidated by teaching adults.  To be honest, I have never gotten over my disbelief that people will do what I say.  Once in every class I think, "why are they listening to me?"  As a student, I know that if I have driven to the class, I'll do what the teacher says.  But these lovely people just keep showing up, Tuesday after Tuesday (450+ times!).  I am truly blessed.
      Another remarkable thing is how much I still need to learn.  Each time I practice on my own, attend a class or teach a class I learn something new.  Just this morning, I learned how to get deeper into Garudasana (eagle pose) from watching one of my students.  Who knew that if you lifted your top leg a little more, the whole thing gets easier (I'm definitely going to need to work on this one when no one is watching... like I said last Thursday, lately I've been having a falling down practice, not a standing practice).  When the teacher and student salute one another with a "Namaste" at the end of class, it is truly felt on both sides.  I have learned a lot from my students.  Thanks.

         What better way to say thank you than with gifts?  The table was full of sugar scrub and healing crystals for my faithful students.  Now, what I'd really like to have here is a picture of the food, but someone came to class unprepared (yes, that's me of course) and my phone's battery was dying.

          Later in the day, I had a meeting with the great folks at Netcrafters.   One of the topics we talked about was who my target audience is.  In the traffic jam on the way home I figured it out!  All of my students loved the red chile chocolate cookies-  these are my people.  If you want to join the tribe, here is the recipe (we like them so much we keep them frozen and only cook one serving at a time. It is not energy efficient, but it does save the expanding waistline).

Red Chile Chocolate Cookies
1 1/2 sticks butter
1 c. brown sugar
1/2 c. sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp. vanilla
dash salt
1 1/2 Tbsp. cayenne pepper
1/3 c. cocoa
1/2 tsp. baking soda
2 c. flour

Preheat oven 350.
Mix first 8 ingredients on low with a mixer until just blended.
Mix in baking soda and flour.  
Line cookie sheets with parchment paper.
Scoop dough into 1 Tbsp. balls and bake for 8-10 minutes.

Practice Makes Perfect

        You know how every once in a while you are in a sweet spot, a time where you are leaping and growing.  Right now, that is me with yoga. It feels like I am understanding more and more deeply, but also like I am more and more of a beginner because the depth of my ignorance is clearer. I'm loving it.  Almost every class I teach begins with the disclaimer "I've never taught this before, so let me know if you understand what I am saying..."
      I was not sure what was different for quite some time, but then it came to me.  Slowly, almost imperceptibly my home practice has been increasing.  There were years where my practice was limited to 10-20 minutes, a few times a week, never when I took or taught a class.  Recently I have been practicing a little over an hour six days a week (Sunday is for God and family).

     What a difference it makes!  The best description I found for the power of practice comes from
  Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain.  I have read about the 10,000 hours needed to master a subject, but listen to how she describes practicing...

         "What's so magical about solitude? In many fields, (Anders) Ericsson told me, it's only when you're alone that you can engage in Deliberate Practice, which he has identified as the key to exceptional achievement.  When you practice deliberately, you identify the tasks or knowledge that are just out of your reach, strive to upgrade your performance, monitor your progress, and revise accordingly.  Practice sessions that fall short of this standard are not only less useful- they're counterproductive.  They reinforce existing cognitive mechanisms instead of improving them."

       Classes are important, they introduce new ways of thinking, and through the years of my very weak home practice, the date with my mom for yoga class each week kept me moving.  But...

"If you want to improve what you're doing, you have to be the one who generates the move.  Imagine a group class- you're the one generating the move only a small percentage of the time."

For me the perfect mix is to take two very different classes a week (one hot, one flow), teach several classes (because I think more during a class), and six days of home practice.  So, it took my 15 years to figure this out.  Some of us are slow.

Fall Seven Times, Stand Up Eight

      In yoga, poses performed while standing are called (gasp!) standing poses.  Let's just say that today I had a falling down practice rather than a standing practice.  I was so frustrated that I took a break from my practice to run over to the table to scribble down some thoughts on what true courage and perseverance is (because, by God, didn't I need to pat myself on the back for continuing?).
     Is it more courageous to step off the diving board or get up every morning when you are frustrated with your life?  What about charging onto the battlefield or patching up wounded, dying soldiers day after day?  Is this way too deep for your average yoga practice?  I find that my home practice brings up the deepest thoughts.
     Now, I know we are talking about different types courage (or maybe perseverance).  But lets just say, I was falling over constantly and calm and peaceful were the last things on my mind.  I kept up my practice, falling over and getting back up, and all of the sudden there was a sharp warmth in my shoulder and it felt like something warm was flowing in my arm.  At the time, I was wondering if this was a good thing or had I injured it?
     The end result is remarkable. I regained about 15 degrees in the range of motion in my left shoulder.  There is no pain, even hours later.  This would not have happened if I stopped the first (or fifteenth) time I fell over.  It would not have happened if I got frustrated with the pace of my progress and quit my home practice. 
      I have been teaching for nine years and practicing for fifteen.  The major breakthroughs can be counted on my two thumbs, but each time I come to the mat, I maintain my present level and learn a little something new.  I am grateful for the little things, but it was wonderful to spend a little time on the mountaintop.

When Life is a Pain in the Neck, Part 2

    Earlier this year, I posted about an easy acupressure technique to release a stiff neck.  Here is the YouTube video to demonstrate the technique.

   We have used this in the past several yoga classes, but I would like to add something that I discovered today.  When I looked at my students after we had done the technique and thoroughly warmed up the body, though the necks were moving freely, there was still a lack of motion in the upper body.

   Now, I'm not sure where I learned this so I can't call it an acupressure point, but I do know that today's students experienced more freedom of motion after pressing it.
    Start on your weaker side. To find the correct place, lift your arm to over 90 degrees with your elbow bent.  Pressing around in the back curve of your armpit, you'll notice a big plate of muscle on the back wall of the armpit.  The point that you are looking for is just in the front of the muscle.  Dig in gently and (for most of us) the body gives a pretty strong pain reaction.
  After you have found the point, let your arm relax down by your side.  Hold the point until your pain diminishes (or your arm gets tired).  Move to your stronger side (for most of us, this is the dominant hand).  Find the point, relax your arm by your side, and hold the point.
      Usually the act of using the weaker arm will aggravate the shoulder again, so go back to the first side and do the hold again.
       Finish with a bit of deep breathing and go back to enjoying your day, this time with a bit more freedom of motion.

Sometimes Progress Feels Like Retreat

relaxation and rest

    Yeah, it's frustrating.  The world tells you that happiness is where it's at.  Keep a gratitude journal.  Take time to do what you enjoy.  Relax like a cat.  But what happens when your path takes you through darkness?
    The first time I ever experienced this was in a yoga class.  The class was at the old Tri City YMCA, taught by Shalini Latour (aside from being a yoga teacher, she makes gourmet chocolates, yum!).  The class focused on neck position.  In each pose she would talk us into correct placement of the head and shoulders.  About 45 minutes into class I began to cry.  Tears flooded down my face.
        It was like there was a cyst of unhappiness in my shoulder and when the muscles relaxed, it released all of the poisonous emotions stored there.  At the time I was mortified, but everyone just let me be and  I finished the class.  Of course, later I learned that emotions can be stored in the body, and are often expressed on the way out.

Me, trying to get into the Elephant camp
 Chang Mai, Thailand

        At these times, it is important to remember the glass is half full.  Here we are, working so hard to be positive. To get there, sometimes you have to plow through yesterday's troubles to get to tomorrow's peace.
       This picture is of me in Thailand.  It is in 1989 and I am at my young, fit best.  Look at my body posture. I'm terrified.   Notice the fear in my body. This fear (or anger or grief or whatever other emotion) happens all the time.  If you don't let it out, it get's stored in the body.
       It is important to remember that the healing crisis, whether it be physical or emotional, is part of the healing process.  Let the unhappy feelings wash over you, then return to your emotional center, the calm of a cat sleeping, safe and secure.

Who Needs Big Brother?

Me on the iPad

     Last night I made an interesting experiment.  I have always wondered what I look like when I do yoga.  I've spent the last 9 years demonstrating, but have never really been sure it was clear.  I finally figured out how to know.  I set the iPad up on the floor next to me as I practiced.  Now the bad part was that the iPad is angled, so I had a triple chin and my belly was huge, but I noticed some very interesting (and reassuring) things.
     First a caution, watching yourself is not for the faint of heart.  You will be surprised how often you fall down, grunt, pant and possibly curse, but what we are looking for is the overall picture.  The thing that I found the most reinforcing was how my downward dog just kept improving as the practice went on.  In each pose, with each adjustment I was both marshaling my energy and expanding outward.
      I also noticed easy fixes for poses that feel problematic.  In my cat-cow, the heads of my arm bones are rolled forward. In today's practice, rolling them out and back felt so much better.  In standing poses, bend the front knee more, in eagle pose (garudasana), sit down further.  All of these changes were so easy and really improved my practice. It let me be my own teacher.
     Now don't go overboard and tape each practice.  A home practice is about inner correction and knowing, but sometimes, an outside perspective can help.

Your Inner Fountain of Youth: Yoga for the Face

He reminds me of Jackie Chan
"Take this, wrinkles!"

    Do you remember how your mother said "If you keep making that face, it might stay that way forever!"  Turns out she may have been right.  We hold so much tension and suppressed emotions in our faces, often we don't look our youthful best.
    Over the past weekend I had a booth at the Victory of Light festival in Sharonville, Ohio.  I was lucky enough to be right next to Sebastian Rey Skin products.  The men at the booth were so much fun, it was like having a floor show all weekend.  Even more important, they looked so young!  As the Expo began to wear down, we had more free time to talk.  Now, a girl never tells, but these men looked about 20 years younger than they were.  Talk about a ringing endorsement for self care.
     Tuesday's yoga class brought this into the physical by relaxing and restoring the face from the inside.  It is always so interesting to find how much tension we store in the eyes and jaws and how easy it is to release it (if only for a little while).  Here is a shorter version of the practice to use at home. (Writing this blog post has been very relaxing, because I keep doing the acupressure points to figure out how to accurately describe them.)
     (The beginning massage is loosely derived from Acupressure's Potent Points: A Guide to Self-Care for Common Ailments.  I highly recommend this book! It explains acupressure, then offers relief for what ails you.)

image from Healing Journeys

• Begin by taking a comfortable seat in a chair or on the floor. Settle into the present time and place. Notice your breathing for several rounds.
• Move to more conscious breathing.
• Inhale and imagine it enters through the front of your throat (your fifth chakra).
• Exhale and imagine it exits through the front and back of the throat.
• Allow the breath to settle and bring your hands into prayer pose (anjali mudra).
• Tip your head gently forward and bring the joined hands to your forehead, touching the index fingers to the third eye (the point between your eyebrows). Rest here for a few breaths.
• Keeping the index fingers in place, spread your palms (keeping palms facing one another) and gently place your thumbs on the bone at the outside our your eyes (right where crow's feet begin to form). Rest here for a few breaths.
• Place the index fingers on your jaw, right below your ears.Keep hands off of your face. Rest here for a few breaths.
• Move the index fingers to the back of the neck, about half way between shoulders and base of the skull.  Slide the index fingers about an inch from center line and gently hold. Rest here a few breaths.
• Place index fingers on the base of the skull (occiput). Rest the index fingers about two inches out from center line on the big tendons.  Hold for several breaths.
• Complete by brushing down the whole body. Begin by gently brushing the face with your hands, moving down the neck and whole body. Crown pull, moving the fingers out from center line on your whole scalp, massaging the head. Pull hands out from center line for the neck, top to bottom and finish by pulling hands over base of the neck to shoulders.

Cat-cow (Majariasana)
from Women's Health

• Come to table pose (svanasana) on your hands and knees.Exhale, round your back into cow. Inhale, arch back and look up into cat. Move through cat-cow (majariasana) with your breath for several rounds.
• Allow the body to settle back into table pose (svanasana).
• Move through cat-cow again, but this time inhale into cow (not cat!), arching your back high.  Imagine that you are inhaling through the back of your heart. Exhale, opening the front of your chest, moving into cat. Continue for several rounds.
• Now time to add the face. As you exhale for cat, open your mouth and eyes wide, sticking your tongue out just like the guy in this picture (keep those eyes open). Continue for several rounds.

• Settle back to table, relax your face, turn your toes under and stretch back to downward facing dog (adho mukha swanasana). 
• Since this is our first down dog, stretch out your legs, moving from side to side to open the backs of the legs and hips.
• Settle back to your downward facing dog, then begin cat-cow just like the last time on your hands and knees. Inhale, round your back up to the sky, breathing in through your heart. Exhale, open your mouth and eyes, sticking your tongue way out.  Move through cat-cow for several more rounds.
• Walk your feet up to your hands, coming to uttanasana (standing forward bend). Place your hands on your hips, inhale to mountain pose (tadasana).

    Now that your face muscles are awake and alive, on to your regular practice.  Do a few sun salutations paying attention to relaxing the face, particularly the eyes and jaw.  Soften the eyes and give a small smile (think smiling Buddha, not Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland).

    I like the first sun salutations to be very gentle, walking back and forth rather than jumping, and making the poses very gentle variations, continuing to pay attention to the face.  Work your way gradually up to jumping back and forth between uttanasana and plank and more vigorous poses, always softening the eyes and jaw. 

    Continue to inversions and standing poses while relaxing the face. End with corpse pose (savasana), setting an intention to relax your face consciously every day. Dip into your inner fountain of youth.

How to Grow in a Desert? Focus Your Energy

flowers in the desert- source

      There is a desert, the Atacama, that stretches from Peru to Chile, where parts have not seen rain since record keeping began.  The only moisture available comes from a dense fog known as camanchaca, formed when cold air associated with ocean currents originating in the Antarctic hits warmer air. The amazing thing is that this harsh climate supports more than a million people.  Both plants and people survive by harvesting the camanchaca fog.
         The plants are low growing, having hairy leaves and many branches to provide the most surface area for the fog to condense upon. People do something similar. They use fog nets, fine mesh screens that capture the fog and allow it to condense.  This provides enough water for the people, but also their animals and crops to survive.  Scientists are developing man made structures to to the same thing. I have included some fascinating pictures of fog towers in development.  The final towers will be 400 meters tall!

Alberto Fernández and Susana Ortega's fog tower- source

            I learned about this fascinating place several years ago, and as with so many things, promptly forgot.  At Friday's yoga class, in the middle of savasana meditation, it popped up in my mind (sorry Wendy).  Recently I have been told by several people that I need to narrow my focus.  The reason I am not seeing the success that I desire is that I am giving too much passion to too many projects.  I have been sending out energy like fog in the desert, plenty of water, but all it nurtures are a million tiny plants.  Even before this advice, I had been thinking maybe it is time to stop taking the next class and playing around with the next bit of healing technology.  I really like reiki and yoga, with a little help from the BioGenesis tools and the crystals.

fine mesh to capture the fog

      It is time to pick one of two affirmations and set them up like fog towers in my own personal desert.  At first, even thinking about doing this was a bit daunting.  It is easier for me to see a few steps than the ultimate objective.  In this instance clarity came, not in a flash of insight, but in realizing what I don't need to work on.
       A friend had offered me a book about deathbed wishes (you know... I wish I had - spent more time with my kids- had a relationship with my family- worked for charity etc, etc, etc).  All of these desires are great, but they are what I spent the first half of my life working on.  In staying home with the children and focusing on family and church work, these areas feel strong.  What I need to work on is what everyone else does in their twenties- business and health.  Once I figured out the focus, the affirmations began to arise.  One is very strong and the other is still a bit murky.  I know I have it right when I can look myself in the eyes in a mirror as I say the affirmation out loud.
        Like the fog towers in the desert, my two affirmations are already beginning to collect energy.  When I arise in the morning, they are my fuel.  Before beginning my yoga practice, they are my intentions.  Even as I clean house, it is toward these affirmations.  With these in mind, I drink the cool clear water of progress rather than wandering in the fog.

Ta-Da! -sana: Opening to Grace

     Does it ever feel like God is trying to get you to understand something?  The longer you don't get it, the higher the volume goes?  I have been having that month. It all began with a song....

      For my next song in voice lessons, I was assigned My Soul is Thirsting (Psalm 63) by Steve Angrisano.  This is a video of the author teaching a group the refrain.  Now I just love the psalms.  They express every emotion from love to rage to hate to envy to longing.  There is a psalm for every situation.  It makes me feel a little less alone in the dark nights, others have been here long before me and found a way out.
     I played around with the song.  First just learning the tune, then practicing different aspects. But, I didn't really think about it much. So, God ups the ante....
    Two weeks later I took a great weekend of yoga from Sianna Sherman (posts about her video and some of the lessons learned).  One of the things she mentioned several times is that with each inhale the body is healing (in reiki we would say 'releasing blocks').  It stuck in my mind.  I just could not make sense of it.  If I get better with each inhale (and I have quite a few inhales under my belt), why am I ageing? It feels more like I am creating blocks rather than releasing most of the time.

Window at Peaceful Meadow Retreat.

    I ruminated on the thoughts about thirsting for God and healing with each inhale, turning the puzzle pieces over and rearranging them in my mind.   On Saturday they suddenly came together.  It reminded me of this picture.  We had taken several pictures in a row of this window.  Most were fairly dark and did not capture the feelings we were looking for.  This one was the third of five exposures.  The interesting thing is it was the middle picture.  In this one photo, you can see the grace that is always there.

source

     Our souls thirst until we open the doors to let God in. He is always there waiting. Each inhale heals the body if it is made with an open heart.  Each inhale in anger, hurt and shame creates ill health or dis-ease.
     I spent an hour on Saturday going through my computer, trying to find a picture of someone with an open heart.  I couldn't find a single one.  We all see the camera and shy away.  People cross arms in front of their bellies or round their shoulders to hide.  When I mentioned this at the Reiki Share on Sunday, Lorna Barrett,  a fellow yoga teacher told me how she teaches this to her students.  In your mind imagine that you are a gymnast who has just completed a major routine.  Spread the fingers and toes and open your heart up to the grace all around you.  Stand tall and Ta-Da! in tadasana.


P.S. If you want to experience this great teaching style first hand, Lorna's classes are at the R.C. Durr YMCA in Burlington, KY Monday and Wednesday at 11.

Pranam: Sianna Sherman DVD Review

      I have been teaching yoga for nearly 9 years now and one of the most common questions I am asked before and after class is "Do you recommend any yoga videos?"  Until now the answer has always been not really. I enjoyed the Rodney Yee yoga for back care that was on VCR (of all things!) but am not as fond of the new one.  So many videos just name and demonstrate the asana (poses) but don't give adequate instruction to prevent injury at home.
     Now I have found a DVD that I can recommend without reservations, Pranam with Sianna Sherman. I have had the video for a few months and I just love it.  The flow is very carefully crafted to open each part of the body before it is extended into more advanced poses. It also cleverly acknowledges the flow of life and our need to both surrender to it and move actively with the flow. The practice is divided into four sections;

1. East/ air/ inspiration
2. South/ fire/ courage
3. West/ water/ flow
4. North/ earth/ grounding and gratitude

       Most poses are visited several times throughout the practice with progressively more difficult options. Though she does not offer easier variations using straps and blocks, I found it very easy to modify the more advanced poses to my level .  What I really love is the vocal instructions for the advanced poses.  I will continue to perform a variation that is at my level, but her instructions allow me to move more deeply within my body as I perform the same pose.  For example, Urdhva Dhanurasana (full backbend) is out of my practice for a few weeks while I heal an injury.  As I listen to the DVD, I lay on my back with hands and feet where they would be for the pose and perform all of the inner motions without moving up to full wheel. So, I connect the hands strongly, root the tail bone, press the shoulder blades into the heart, and so on.  This allows me to do the internal work without aggravating an injury.

     The nice part about having these more difficult variations is that it reminds us to keep adding to our practice.   For example, bakasana (crow) jumping back into chaturanga dandasana (low plank) has just entered my world.  Now I'm going to apologize first,  I couldn't find some free professional pictures, so this is me in jeans and a tshirt after judging a Speech and Drama meet most of the day.  But wow! What a gift Sianna gave me!

chaturanga dandasana

bakasana

Just jump
from here...
             ... to here!


    The best praise I can give this video is that I could listen to her talk and not do the yoga, just to have her remind me of the inspiration all around, the courage that is already with in us to use the inspiration, the fluidity to allow change and the peace to remain grounded.  I highly recommend this DVD!

Not Tonight, I Have a Headache: Yoga for the Head

    Until this last week I would have said I don't get headaches very often, but I was wrong. It is one of the curious things about long term pain.  So often we forget it is there, just like the static on a stereo system or the twinge in your knee.  If you can't fix it, ignore it.  Over the past week, I have been using the poses described below and the relief is amazing.
    Recently, I attended the closing classes of Shine Yoga Studio (here's a post on what a gift the studio has been to me for many years).   Not only are classes with the traveling teachers like Sianna Sherman  fun and interesting, but they tend to use poses that we may have let drop from our daily practice.  She used several facial expressions in various ways throughout the classes.  What I have discovered in my home practice is they are wonderful in releasing facial tension, relaxing the head and shoulders, and, best of all, relieving stress headaches!

source

        The class was about opening to change in our lives, becoming a bit like this guy here on the left.  He is Hanuman, the Hindu monkey god.  Hanumanasana (the asana or pose of Hanuman) is the splits, one very open position that I love watching other people do.  One thing you will immediately notice is his very puffy cheeks (here is the story of how it came to pass). Sianna mentioned making his face is a great way to open up the muscles in your face, but we didn't do it in class. So here is what I came up with at home....
            - sit quietly, becoming more aware of your cheeks and jaw
            -  inhale, filling your cheeks up with air
            - swish the air around in your cheeks, pressing the ball of air into anyplace that feels tight
                                                        - remember to go into the lower jaw, the hinge of the jaw and the area between your nose and mouth
                                                         - exhale, noticing how the cheeks and jaw feels

source

      Our other facial expression was from the god, Kali.  She is often pictured with her tongue sticking out.  Unfortunately, the only pictures I could find had her mouth closed and that is not the posture we are looking for.  This lovely cat, on the other hand, has the mouth just right. Kali face (as I call the expression in my mind) is much more active than Hanuman's.  To find the Kali face....
            - inhale with the face relaxed
            - exhale - open eyes wide
                         - open mouth wide
                         - stick your tongue way out
                         - make an audible Hah! with the breath
            - repeat
     I noticed that this expression really digs in and releases the tongue and jaw muscles.  Hanuman's face releases the cheeks and lips.  Once I let go of the tension in the lower half of my face, my head begins to feel better.  The more I relax it, the feeling begins to spread to the base of the skull and down the neck and throat.
      The funny thing is how making these faces also makes you laugh.  You feel ridiculous and that can be lots of fun.  I'm sure the laughter helps in stress relief as well.  Play around with them and let me know what you think.  Blessings and laughter. Pam