Oh, What a Beautiful Morning!

     What a great morning! Hot, freshly ground coffee. Freshly baked bread. A little Schlock Mercenary to accompany. And now my first post on the new computer.
       The week before last my computer gave up the ghost. Oh, it would turn on; it just wouldn't do much after that. I tried finishing up a solar eclipse post on the 22nd of August and it just laughed at me. I would do the writing on my iPad, then go to the computer to add the pictures when I could get it to work. Two hours later, no finish in sight. It was time.
     So today is Christmas, three months early. I hope the joy that is abounding in my house spills out to you. Have a great Thursday and I'll get back to regular posting once I get all of the computer stuff up and running. Tomorrow sound good to you? It's a date.

Making Life Meaningful

      What makes you get up out of bed in the morning?
      If your first thought is 'duh, the alarm clock', try going a little deeper.  Do you leap out of bed with the idea that today will be a pleasure, doing what you love?  Or is rising from bed a slower, more painful process?
     On the islands of Okinawa, they have a concept that we don't even have a word for in English (like schadenfreude in German).  It is called ikigai which can be loosely translated as "the reason to get up in the morning" or life purpose.  I first heard about it in The Blue Zones: Lessons for Living Longer From the People Who've Lived the Longest.  Here is the same concept on YouTube .

     The concept has always made sense to me intellectually, but never in the context of my life.  I've been a student, a naval officer, a mother, an employee, a volunteer but none of these 'jobs' were the reason to leap from bed.  All of these things were what I do, not who I am.  Let's just say the whole thing bugged me.  This fisherman on Okinawa still relished fishing at 86; it was his ikigai.  Where was mine?

     It crystallized this week.  I went onto the Authentic Happiness website and took the VIA survey of Character Strengths.  The results were baffling.  What a useless group of strengths.  Here they are:

1. Appreciation of beauty and excellence
2. Spirituality, sense of purpose, and faith
3. Curiosity and interest in the world
4. Love of learning
5. Zest, enthusiasm, and energy

      Doesn't it kind of look like a recipe for the eternal college student who has studied art, art history, divinity, and basket weaving?  When I looked at it from the perspective of ikigai, it looked different.  It became very clear.  My reason to get out of bed in the morning was almost the same as my business mission statement (Creating a more peaceful world one satisfied client at a time).   My ikigai is "make each meeting matter."  

      Not only does it make each person I meet a little happier, but it also is a continual challenge for my personal growth.  Sometimes it's just easier to resent the person in line who is yelling at their kids or who cut me off in traffic rather than loving them into a better world.  What is interesting is that I have been living by this "rule" for all of my life, but writing it down clearly was such a relief.  Not only did it clarify some past decisions but it also freed me to be the person I have always been.  Strange, but wonderful.

     Now, a lot of you readers I only touch through these posts.  To make this meeting matter, I need to provide interesting information in a clear manner that helps make your life better.  I hope this post fulfills those criteria and helps you find your ikigai.  The journey is worth it.

The End of an Era

    Tomorrow is the last day of business for Shine Yoga Center.  This has been the "date day" destination for my mother and I for years.  Once a week we meet for class, then go to my mom's house for eggs for lunch.  It seems like such a small thing, but what a powerful effect.
    We all were asked to write a special memory of Shine in a beautiful yoga book of poses.  The first few times it was mentioned, I thought I had nothing to offer.  I have learned a lot, that (hopefully) I've passed down to my students, but nothing that might mean anything to someone who only knows me as a student in a class where movement, not talking is the focus.

  I wanted to contribute, but was lost.  Finally I resorted to flipping through the book.  There were no partner poses (though I did love the two pages with the balasana (child's pose) facing one another.  It seemed to represent Mom and I, the eternal beginners).  Finally, at the end of the book, I found this pose, Garudasana in Sirsasana ( or, for the rest of us, headstand with eagle pose legs). Now, Mom and I both have a headstand, but neither one of us has eagle pose (my legs are too tight and she doesn't like balance poses).  But when I saw it, it fit.
   Here is this woman, looking at the world upside down (yes, already a good fit), but also with the legs wrapped closely together.  Since Mom and I have had the good fortune to spend so much time together, we fit together.
    We are not the same.  We are not two right legs, but each of us complements the other in unexpected ways.  Just like eagle pose legs, we are entwined but separate, reaching ever upward on our own path while guided and lifted by the other.
   What made the realization even more special was that this very thing is the reason for the owner to move on.  She has three young children and would like to give them the gift that she gave us, the gift of presence.  My blessing on this wonderful woman is that she find in her life what she gave me, children close and involved, but realizing their own life. What more could a mother wish for?
      My deepest gratitude to my teachers at Shine and hopes for a successful future as myyogaco.com.   See you next Friday Mom.

A Study in Contrasts

     One of the things I love best about yoga is the deep contrasts that fill the practice.  Yoga is a practice of movement and stillness, of drawing in muscular energy and radiating out organic energy, of peace and of joy.  Anyone who has attended one of my classes knows that the class is mostly quiet, but I tend to try to get my student’s to laugh. If they don't laugh, I'll still laugh at myself because usually when I'm laughing, it means I'm a bit uncomfortable.  Being a bit off balance really adds to the adventure.  I know in my home practice and in the classes I attend, if I don’t fall down at least once, I haven’t been trying very hard.

“First there is the fall, and then we recover from the fall.  Both are the mercy of God!”- Lady Julian of Norwich

     Without falling down, and risking the appearance of failure, we don’t know just how far we can push life.  Each step out into uncertainty brings growth. Grandma Moses started painting in her seventies.  What if she was too afraid? My childhood Christmas favorite, ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas  was illustrated by someone who society says should have been sitting around waiting to die. Just think, Julian of Norwich lived from 1342-1416.  It seems so long ago, but truth is truth no matter when it was learned.

     It may seem strange that I equate falling down with laughing, but in yoga classes, they are often the same.   We approach class very seriously, usually with very clear goals.  The goals may vary from a getting a workout to finding inner peace to weight loss to increasing flexibility.  The problem is, when we hold so tightly to our goals, we can lose sight of other benefits.  

BKS Iyengar, the master of alignment, in Triangle

    I love to laugh, even in the most trying times.  It can be rather annoying for those around me… Think about how it changes things.  Say you are doing Triangle pose.  I just love to use this pose to teach the principles of alignment.  So, you are in my class and I have told you “draw muscular energy  up your legs, inward spiral the back leg, outward spiral the front leg, press strongly into the outside edge of the back foot.”  We haven’t made it above the waistline and already you have 4 things to think about.  If you don’t start smiling now, your brain may explode!

    The interesting thing is, once I perform the final bit of alignment  in any pose, the smile, I find that the outer skin begins to soften.  The muscles that were holding so tightly to my purpose become more gentle, more flexible.  The pose becomes a joy.

     I was thinking about this recently when my husband and I were staying at a friend’s house.  It is a bit older and the plumbing wasn’t the best (Yes, it takes a special kind of crazy to move from joy to bad plumbing, but just follow along, it should make sense soon).  As I began my shower, my husband began to shave.  Let’s just say the demands of the sink completely overpowered the demand of the shower.  The temperature gyrated wildly from arctic to boiling.  What was interesting was that, as soon as I let go of the idea that cold was bad, it became invigorating.  As soon as I relaxed to the hot water, it was only boiling in comparison to the cold. The hot was actually pleasant.  I began thinking, maybe I should do this again tomorrow to see if I really don’t like it or was it just so different from my norm I categorized it as bad?

    As Richard Rohr says in Falling Upward: Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life “Our institutions and our expectations, including our churches, are almost entirely configured to encourage, support, reward, and validate the the [status quo].”  He is talking about the importance of status, security and stability of living by the rules.  Smiling and falling over is about breaking the rules.  Soften the outer skin and have fun!

It's the Little Things

   I'll never forget waking up in October of 1984 to hear that the U.S. had invaded Grenada.  My first thought was "Where in the heck is Grenada?"  but the second was a renewal of my desire to join the Navy.  I wanted to make the world safe for democracy and  President Reagan was paving the way.
   As that day faded into obscurity, becoming a footnote of Reagan's presidency, periodically I wondered if it had been a good idea.  There were 34 people killed and 175 people wounded.  As a mom, it just seems wrong.
      Then I saw something wonderful in the Olympics coverage.  There was a "get to know" piece on Kirani James, who went on to win gold in the 400m.  Did you know, in Grenada, they celebrate the invasion as Thanksgiving Day. As I watched the piece I couldn't stop crying. Are those deaths justified, I don't know.  Are they honored, absolutely.  I had no idea there was any inner conflict, but there you are.
     It is one of the seldom mentioned side effects of taking an energy healing class like I described yesterday. Not only do you learn to heal others, you are healed yourself.  In the midst, I'm still trying to finish all the case studies. My husband calls it drinking through a fire hose.
    So back to this invasion, how is it a little thing?  Well, in the big sweep of history, it is.  Neither of my teenage sons (one in college and one a senior in high school) had even heard of it.  The big sweep of history is like the whirlwind of work and learning I created by taking this class.
     This picture is one more of those little things.  It is my one of my favorites from our Chicago trip.  We were in Millennium Park.  Home of many beautiful public spaces.  This weed, randomly planted by the wind, was the best part of the park to me.  The effervescent, explosive shape and way that it caught the light was visible from the other side of the park even though it was only 7 inches tall.  Is the midst of life's swirl, it is important to notice the beautiful little things.
     Today one of my sons and I were taking a long walk, each of us needing to clear our heads from our studies, and we found a new path in the woods!  Okay, new to us.  But we have lived here for 18 years and the path is within 100 yards of our house.  We had both walked by it many times over the years.  When the woods wrapped around us we slowed down and stopped talking.  We were just present to the moment, living in now.  Now felt pretty good. Today truly became our Thanksgiving Day.
   

Kentucky in the Summer

     I had several lofty thoughts prepared, but as usual, am side tracked by my body... I just love to eat.  Here is the reason to live in Kentucky in the summer.

All this bounty from the farmer's market for only $10 (there was more, but I ate some on the way home...).  All locally grown, from people I have known for years (and a few new friends).  I can't think of a better thing to socialize over.  Be Blessed!

Blessed Sleep; or, Sleeping Well, but Not In

    Yesterday's post talked about my new holographic connector device.  This can be used to entrain water or jewelry to affirmations or positive energies, just like the fashionable power/balance wrist bands. As usual, I was the skeptic.  After last night there was no question in my mind.
   I began from the comfort point of view.  If I was going to sleep in this bracelet, it had better be comfortable. Shopping extensively (at Walmart...), I found stretch lace made for wedding headbands. I cut a length that would fit around my wrist and made a bracelet that would be comfortable to sleep in.

    Definitely not a fashion statement, but I don't want to encourage sleepiness in public either.  Last night I went to bed more than an hour earlier than usual and slept deeply.  The unintended consequence was a very early morning.  I trained the bracelet to "I go to bed on time.  I sleep deeply and awake refreshed."
     Though I tried hard to sleep in, I just couldn't. I awoke refreshed.  I tried to sleep in, in bed. I tried to sleep in on the couch. (This almost sounds like Dr. Suess) It just wouldn't take.  Drinking coffee on the porch with Joy as the birds woke up was mighty nice.  The run that followed was pretty good as well.
    Here I am.  It's only 8:30 and I'm ready for bed.  What's a decadent capitalist to do?  Hope this sticks, of course.  I want every day to feel magical and a good night's sleep is a great foundation.
    On the Fourth of July, after the great parade, my sister in law, brother, kids and I walked around Northside.  After several hours at the children's festival and wandering, we ended up in the air conditioning.  I'm not sure of the bar, but it had an attached deli, so we had food, beer and a/c.  The world does not get much better.

     Our table had some residue from former tenants; beer glasses, a plate, and a pile of fabric.  That fabric turned out to be butterfly wings.    
      My nephew, all of three years old, was ecstatic.  I remember the feeling. Out of the dress up box I would make waist length (or longer) hair, cathedral length trains, beautiful ball gowns.  It is a feeling I long to recreate. Maybe with a bit more sleep....

Very Genki Indeed or How to Live Your Values

        Very often I get caught up in the drudgery of doing, rather than the joy of being.  I have all these things to accomplish sometimes I forget that there is more than one way to do things.  A few years ago I heard a lecture by Dr John Demartini.  He gave a 10 question values determination that changed my life.  These are not the overarching principles of your life, more the values that set your course each day.

         I have always loved to teach, but used to be a bit more like the strict nun we all loved to hate rather than the fun teacher.  The first time I completed the values determination, having fun was my fourth most important value.  Now my classes are more light-hearted, full of laughter and movement.  This cartoon http://reikimarketing.com/ captures the flavor.  I love the look on the middle woman's face.   Five years ago, that was me....

        Another interesting thing I learned was that any human interaction fills my social needs.  It is great because I can derive great pleasure from just talking to the check out clerk and bagger at the grocery store (you know who you are...).  It is not so great because I tend to neglect my family and friends.  When I figured this out, I could make a few remedies, be more conscious in my interactions.  My calendar is now full of scheduled time with friends and family, because we all know I am the least likely person to pick up the phone just to say hi.  Now I need to figure out how to translate this to social media (sorry Facebook friends...)
       My Japanese tutoring students have tried for years to explain the word, genki.   The English translations range from healthy to energetic to lively.  The best description I ever heard was the feeling a dog expresses as he sticks his head out the window with ears streaming back in the wind.  May living your values make you very genki.

Start Your Week by Being

           On Sunday, as I was helping my son pack to return to camp, he asked me if I could write up a few things to do with the campers to create a community and (hopefully) use that sense of community to encourage both better behavior and more fun.  Over the years I have done a lot of substitute teaching, working with the children at church and have taught yoga at daycare.  This means I have a lot of resources for community building games that are fun, but don't require any "stuff," just a sense of adventure and a bit of leadership.  One of the things I pulled out was my Yoga Pretzels (Yoga Cards).  This has been a lifesaver on many occasions. The authors and I have very similar styles, mixing education with fun and down right silliness.
           Taking some ideas from the cards and others from experience, I wrote up a one page team building blueprint.  Somewhere in the back of my mind I was both happy and sad that I wouldn't be the one doing these things.  When I returned from dropping him off at camp and began to clean up, this is what I found on the bottom of one of the yoga cards.

"The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are."

                                        - Joseph Campbell
           I can't imagine a better way to organize my week.  Concentrate a bit more on being and a bit less on doing.
 


     A little addendum....  I wrote this post just before my run, but waited to publish so that I could review it.  While I was running (or to an outside observer, staggering), I had an experience that I have not had since leaving Italy in 1996.
           One thing I loved about living in Europe is that European men have a way of letting you know that you are appreciated as a woman without being threatening or suggestive.  It was a nice feeling.  There was this one Greek waiter in Pippo Pappo's restaurant in Aci Trezza, Sicily who flirted outrageously with me the entire time I was pregnant with my first son.
          Back to today, I ran by some men who were fixing the sidewalk. One of them, without ever taking his eyes off my face, let me know that I was a beautiful woman.  For a short, rounded, 45 year old woman, it was unexpected and oh-so-nice.  It takes so little to make someone's day, I hope to pass the gift on to everyone I meet (the feeling, not the noticing them as a woman, I'll leave that one to the guys...).                          

Celebrate in Parivrtta Janu Sirsasana

     Celebration is not what one normally associates with sitting forward bends.  They are more in line with procrastination and outright avoidance.  I have been part of this movement (or lack of movement) for many years. However, things are beginning to change.
      When I thought about the Fourth of July, the word that comes to mind is celebration.  But how to find celebration in yoga?  Rather than a vigorous, crazy practice, I decided to focus on the feeling that arises after the pose.  After this forward bend, the energy rises through the body, leaving a feeling of effervescence, sometimes even fireworks.  Enjoy. (By the way, Joy the cat joined in again...)

Reflections on Creating

               Here it is!  My website nkyreiki.com has launched.  It is so much like giving birth to a child (though thankfully the gestation was much shorter).  Just like adding that first child to a family, you create the structure to support it (high chair, car seat, bassinet, tiny dishes and cups), decorate the nursery, then go to the hospital to give birth.  The last few weeks I have been nesting, like right before the baby is born (I'll never forget my sister recovering the couch when she was 9 months pregnant, it was a sight).
                Like a new mother, I have not slept for the past two weeks.  I kept waking up at 3 am with visions of website design or ideas for how to fix the things that were bugging me.  This gave me quite a headache when I went to the airport to pick up my mom yesterday.  She was returning from a mission trip to Vietnam.
                At the Naval Academy I studied the Vietnam war extensively.   We had many instructors who had served and I was fascinated with the region.  Maybe I wasn't sleeping also because I was worried about her.  I arrived at the airport when the flight was scheduled to land, so I had time to wait while the bags were unloaded from the plane.
              The temperature was 102 degrees. In the shade.  What's a poor girl with a headache to do?  Lie down of course.  I have learned from Joy the perfect corpse pose or savasana.  I parked in the shade, rolled down all the windows in the car and laid down in the grass.  It was brown and crunchy already, but the world was perfect.  When I got the call to leave the cell phone lot 15 minutes later, my headache was gone.  Completely.

              Mom brought home a picture that expresses the wonderful rooted, grounded feeling we all search for.  This is a tree growing in a Buddhist temple in Vietnam.  Once can see the permanence.  In Poser: My Life in Twenty-three Yoga Poses, Claire Dederer spends a chapter on corpse pose.  She asks "What if the opposite of good wasn't bad? What if the opposite of good was real?"  In my quest for the good (if not perfect) website to express my business, I had let go of the real.  Really there are usually dishes in my sink; really there are usually things on my to do list; really I like it that way.
              For a while I kept a perfect house, it was not comfortable or welcoming. I'm hoping my website is both comfortable and welcoming, please pardon the dirty dishes.

Such a Pain in the Neck!

One of my most requested classes is for pain relief in the neck and shoulders.  I love the request because there are many ways to approach it.  This video is geared to increase blood flow and mobility, then find the correct shoulder and neck alignment.  There is a brief cameo appearance by my cat, Joy.  She would not leave the room for the hour and a half it took me to shoot and edit this (yes, I am that slow).  I think she just wanted to make sure that she did not end up on the cutting room floor.

The funny thing is, when iMovie "optimized" the video, it cut off my feet so you can't see her moving around nearly as much as she did.  Though Joy is not nearly the rock star she was hoping to be, please enjoy this gentle but deep practice to open and align the upper body.

Monday Delight

I had a wonderful talk with a neighbor this morning.  She said being happy 51% of the time was a great beginning.  Here is a similar thought to start your week...

Dedicate yourself to the good you deserve and desire for yourself. Give yourself peace of mind. You deserve to be happy. You deserve delight. ~ Mark Victor Hansen, the founder and co-creator of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" book series.

As I reread this quote, I am reminded of a wonderful trip a few years ago to Columbus.  We went to see a group of Dale Chihuly installations in both museum and garden settings.  I could not believe the variety of emotions he could draw out of me with pieces of glass.  This is a little excerpt from the Wikipedia article on Chihuly.  It describes how he found peace of mind while overcoming tremendous obstacles to his chosen career of glass blowing :

In 1976, while Chihuly was in England, he was involved in a head-on car accident during which he flew through the windshield.^[1][3] His face was severely cut by glass and he was blinded in his left eye. After recovering, he continued to blow glass until he dislocated his right shoulder in a 1979 bodysurfing accident.^[3] No longer able to hold the glass blowing pipe, he hired others to do the work; Chihuly explained the change in a 2006 interview, saying "Once I stepped back, I liked the view" and pointing out that it allowed him to see the work from more perspectives and enabled him to anticipate problems faster.

To continue to create in glass he would make a painting...

Supervise the creation.....

Then find the setting to compliment the work...

Now this is some fine lemonade made from life's lemons.  Not only did Chihuly find a way to give himself delight, but also all of those who see and own his works.

Just a Bit More Joy

     As I was doing my morning prayers, I came upon another great expression. “Shout out in triumph on this joyous morning!”  I am glad there are poets who can express my feelings.

I Arise and Greet the Day

                Some mornings I get up knowing there is nothing that cannot be fixed by the dawning of a new day.  Yesterday was fraught with phone calls and decisions and running about.  This morning as I complete to morning rituals of showering and preparing breakfast all of the pieces fall into place. How could I have missed this thought yesterday?

     
          This is captured  by the picture above and one of my favorite hymns from the Liturgy of the Hours.  This song has been ascribed to St. Patrick:           

I sing as I arise today!

I call upon my Creator’s might:

The will of God to be my guide,

The word of God to be my speech,

The hand of God to be my stay,

The shield of God to be my strength,

The path of God to be my way,

O Father, this we ask be done,

Through Jesus Christ, Your only son,

Whom in the Spirit we adore:

One God who reigns forevermore.

Amen
My prayer for all is that this is your experience as well.  Blessings, Pam