What is Valuable?

African dentistry

     I have good friends in Kenya on a dentistry mission, right at the time of a huge hostage standoff in a Nairobi Mall.  Thank God for the modern phone system so I know they are safe, but there is still an overwhelming fear for them.  I look at what they are doing and at the same time my life.  Is it worth it?  As Jesus said (Matt 26:11) "you will always have the poor among you,"  in other words, there will always be another toothache.  Is the work we see in the picture worth the risk.
       I actually wasn't even aware of why I felt down until I looked at my list of thoughts for this post, all of them were about one or two people living their lives for an obscure cause or group of people, all in Africa.  I've been absolutely riveted to the series the Long Way Down, where Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman travel by motorcycle from Scotland to Cape Town.  It wasn't about the bikes for sure, I've seen way too many horrific accidents among my friends.  It is all about the small stories of the people they met.
 years.  To raise one adult black rhino. One.  How do you measure the worth of your days?

waiting line for the dentist

      One of the men was part of a two man team that were raising a baby black rhino.  It's mom was blind, so could not care for the baby.  They worked toe and toe shifts, sleeping right next to the baby rhino, feeding it a bottle every 3 hours.  The care would continue for 4-7
       Later there was the story of the two HIV positive parents who followed the protocol and gave birth to an HIV negative child.  Do you mourn for the dead who only go to the witch doctor or rejoice for the living child?
      Then the well spoken woman who took care of HIV orphans, teaching the origin of the disease and how to avoid it.  She looked very satisfied with her life and sure it was a good thing to do.
     All of these things are important and valuable and remind us that beauty and grace are in all of the small moments in life, not in the Nobel Peace Prize or being awarded a TED talk.  Are they worth the danger?  If it's my life, I always say sure.  When it is my friend's life that I have no control over, well, that's a much harder proposition.  Good thing they make their own decisions.  God Bless to all

In No Particular Order...

 
     This week is devoted to only one book
Drop Dead Healthy: One Man's Humble Quest for Bodily Perfection by A.J Jacobs. In short, what a fun, funny way to review all sorts of medical advice.  I finished the book in 2 days and laughed the whole time.  I had to keep hiding the book so I would go to bed on time or do some other work.  What better recommendation could you ask for?

     This 2 year odyssey was so far-ranging, I couldn't even figure out how to review it.  So, as any good Navy person would do, I cheated (cooperate and graduate).  This review is by 'takingadayoff' from the Amazon.com website:

"Magazine writer A.J. Jacobs calls it "experiential journalism." He takes on seemingly ridiculous, yet intriguing, challenges. He reads the entire Encyclopedia Britannica. He lives the Bible, even the apparently trivial parts, such as not shaving your face. He outsources his life to a team of personal assistants in India.

He learns along the way and shares his discoveries. It's very entertaining. Jacobs has an easygoing and, for someone who writes almost exclusively in first person, surprisingly non-egotistical style. He works hard at his projects, preparing ahead, and doing research throughout. He's a real pro at being an amateur.

In his latest undertaking, he attempts to become healthy. This is more difficult than it sounds. He plans to go from slightly overweight and out of shape to heroic fitness. And that's not all. He also intends to improve the condition of all of his body parts: skin, nose, hands, etc. All this in two years!

One of the first roadblocks he runs into is the sheer volume of information and theories on how to be fit. The second obstacle is that much of the information is contradictory. There is no agreed upon, guaranteed path to health. Even trusted experts don't agree with one another.

But the main impediment to super health is self control. No surprise there. Jacobs manages to overcome the problem with a variety of methods. When he has trouble giving up a favorite snack, he writes a large check to the American Nazi Party and vows to mail it next time he gives in to temptation. He finds this kind of negative motivation very powerful.

Another trick that works for Jacobs, though not as dramatically effective as the negative motivation, is to digitally age a photo of himself (there's an app for that) so that he can better imagine himself in the future. Being able to picture his future self ("old A.J.") helps him to stick to his goals.

He also finds inspiration in two examples in their nineties - his own grandfather who remained involved in community affairs long after his formal retirement, and fitness expert Jack La Lanne, who kept a busy professional schedule, spreading the word about healthy living, right to the end."

     In short, what a fun, funny way to review all sorts of medical advice.  I finished the book in 2 days and laughed the whole time.  I had to keep hiding the book so I would go to bed on time or do some other work.  What better recommendation could you ask for?

Make Your Heart Sing

    In this season of change, I have come to several conclusions. Unfortunately for my blog, I could not put them into words.  Well fortunately for me, the Dalai Lama took care of one.  I've been reaching for a way to explain discernment among opportunities.  So much 'save the world' work is wonderful, but is it always the best use of your time?
     As a veteran 'I'm going to save everyone' person,  I knew that was not true.  My mentor always says 'go for the low hanging fruit,' which sounds great, but figuring out which fruit that is can be problematic.
     Today I was watching a documentary "I am," on Netflix (more about this wonderful movie tomorrow).  One of the people interviewed was Elisabet Sahtouris, who had spent some time on tour with the Dalai Lama.  Here is her paraphrase of him when asked "What is the best thing we can do?"

"Critical thinking followed by action."  Discern the what your world is.  Notice the plot, the scenario of this human drama and then figure out where your talents might fit in to make a better world.  And each of us must do something that makes our hearts sing, because nobody will want to do it with us if we are not passionate and inspired.

     My ikigai is to make each meeting matter, no matter what I am teaching or doing.  What is yours?

Be a Student of All

    This year has been the year of letting go, from sending the boys to college to releasing old anger to changing how I see everyone I meet.  The empty nest and cleaning up my old baggage are topics for other times, today's thoughts are about seeing each person as a gift to be opened.  So many sages say be childlike in your appreciation of the world, from Jesus (Matt 19:14 "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.") to Rumi (Chew quietly your sweet sugarcane, God-Love, and stay playfully childish.), but how to find that in my regular life?
    I've been given many examples this year, as if this was one of the biggest lessons for me to learn, right now!  My current favorite is what a good friend told me this week over coffee.  She has a beautiful, pure simplicity of spirit that is such a great antidote for my way too serious approach.
     I can't remember what we were talking about, but I asked her how she kept the awareness of God in her everyday life.  She said that as she walked the dog or ran errands, she talked to everyone as if they were a person and made them smile.  At first I completely dismissed what she said (how embarrassing!).  This is way too easy.  I do that all the time.  It's what I love, surely there must be more?
    Just a few minutes later I realized that ease of talking to people is a gift, which means I was given it to better the world around me.  I don't have to start a religious organization or a major charitable foundation to make the world a better place, just talk to the bank tellers, the librarians and the baggers at the grocery, all of my favorite people in the world.  Now I know I've said this both here and here, but I am a very slow learner of the obvious.
     Who knew, just being myself is enough.  The picture above is from Easter five years ago.  My niece is completely happy with her dress, white shoes and a few Easter eggs. It is the little things we do that creates the big changes we all hope for. I hope you have a great week, just being the divinely created child you already are.

Curiouser and curiouser

     One thing I love about life is that the more observant I am, the more interesting life is.  It may be about why the birds are nesting right there in my flowers or why everyone reacts differently to the same occurrence. There is always something to make me question.  Like, is the picture at left a self-portrait, or is it just the forest floor?
     This act of observation is so important when you are gauging progress. Unlike building a house, baking a cake or making a quilt, self-improvement has few physical, quantifiable results.  I do all this "work," sometimes don't feel any different when I finish, but then I start to notice how differently I feel or behave.  My mentor calls it "gathering evidence."
      I'll give you an example.  One of my current "works in progress" is to be internally justified, to look only inward and upward for opinions.  To put it bluntly, I cared way too much about what everyone else thought about me and let that care rule my actions.  It was high time to take my life back.  In a combination of a Brain Gym balance (with homeplay- a daily practice to reinforce the goal) and reiki, I have made great strides.
     Here is where it gets curious.  Recently I have been to several large gatherings of people I really enjoy and have known for some time.  I found myself getting irritated with lots of people, not just one or two.  Why was that?  I like these people, right?
     What I discovered after sitting with the question was, yes, I like these people.  Before the work, rather than admitting they were human and did irritating things (which we all do), I had suppressed my feelings and made them perfect.  I wanted to get along so much that I wasn't honest with myself.
      This being internally justified requires generosity, allowing everyone to be there own crazy self, while staying true to my own crazy self.  Being authentic allows others to be so as well.  As Rumi said "Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."

Treatise on Frenemies by Colin Wright

    Let me just start with, I love crazy people!  People who go their own way, do their own thing and bring back interesting lessons to us.  Colin Wright definitely qualifies.  Every four months he moves to a new country that is chosen for him by his blog readers- no kidding, doesn't even choose the place himself.  I just love it!

      After seeing his TED talk, I was poking around his website and came upon his book  Personal Branding, subtitled "The least you need to know."  As indicated by the subtitle it is a light, funny overview of personal branding from self assessment to grooming.  I just had to share with you his description of the wrong crowd.

"...it can be equally important not to get sucked in to a bad crowd.  A bad crowd consists of anyone who will bring you down personally or professionally.  This includes business associates with bad reputations, frenemies who like to see others fail so they look better by comparison, significant others with incurable emotional issues, and anyone who has ever stabbed you in the back.  Always forgive, never forget and definitely don't let them back into your crowds."

     Well said.