Conspicuous Consumption

     I just had the great good fortune of a short trip to Portland, Oregon. What an amazing place! On our first day we drove from the city to the coast and back in a great triangle. There were moments of breathtaking beauty, signs of great poverty, and huge signs of man's heavy hand on the planet. It was such a moving day in so many ways I'm not sure what to do with it.
      The turmoil began on the drive to the quirky pirate city of Astoria. As we left the city of Portland the beautiful woods of the Northwest closed in about the road. I actually said that it was so beautiful we could turn around and not go any further. It was breathtaking.

the beautiful drive through a very rain soaked window

     As we drove along highway 30 it began to open into farmland. The farm houses grew smaller and in greater disrepair the further we drove from the city. Subsistence living was such a strong contrast to the city were people routinely pay $5 for a cup of coffee.
    In a few miles the land began to rise. We passed truck after truck filled to overflowing with huge logs. Then we hit the first clear cut. A huge swath of the forest cut down to stumps. A long bit of forest, then an area that was selectively logged. The difference between untouched land and logged areas was stark.

each of the white tags in this blurry photo is a newly planted tree

      We reached Astoria with relief. What a great town! If it hadn't been raining I would have stopped in every shop and bar in the place, each looked so unique. We stopped at Pier 39 to have a cup of something warming at Coffee Girl, where they serve coffee over the same bar that the young women would serve coffee to all of the cannery workers on their breaks.

the original coffee counter

The pier was so different from the many naval piers I've been to. It smelled so clean and fresh. The ocean had healed all the scars from it's prior incarnation as a cannery. We went into the shop and ordered some drinks. It's the strangest thing. Driving in a warm, dry car through driving rain. Why did we feel so cold and miserable? The drinks were wonderful and so picturesque I needed a photo.

our table at Coffee Girl

Notice the background? The river was full of container ships going to Portland and other port cities. It was so neat to watch. As we sat there it struck me, most of these ships, in fact, all of them are full of future landfill contents. I try to be careful about my footprint, reusing and recycling as much as possible, but that lovely fabric I just used to make a dress probably came from China in a ship just like this, not to mention the containers I use each Friday to bring dinner home from Chipotle.

     What about the clear cutting we saw earlier? My house is made of wood. My husband is a woodworker, so the basement is full of wood. That Chipotle container is paper. The napkins on our table are paper. Wait, the table is wood!

     I was paralyzed by my complicity in the destruction I saw everywhere. Also, that even with such abundant resources, both locally and from abroad, how many poor subsistence level farms we saw. I know that for some it is a choice they welcome, but for others it is just what they were born into.

     It can be so easy to think 'they' are the problem. The loggers who cut the trees down. The manufacturers who pollute in China. The Enron executives who lived high by lying to employees and investors. The truth is I am 'they.' Not bad, not evil, just responsible for the results from my actions.

    It's been several months since I took these pictures. Each time I set down to write this post, I only got another paragraph. I kept waiting for resolution, for some big change to make it work, to make it make sense.  That sense I was looking for was there all along. I keep thinking I need to change the world, but I just need to change my world. Make the place I live a nicer, kinder, more gentle place. Move from conspicuous to conscious consumption.